Ok so the Fiance showed up unexpectedly last sunday. I was so happy but yet so disappointed. He had just came from the hospital so I was feeling a little guilty. He had been sick all day before and I told him that he should go to the hospital. He finally took my advice on something, I guess that was good. I wanted to tell him all the things that I had been wanting to tell him for months now but I can never seem to find the right words to start the conversation with so I left it alone. So did we talk...well.... NO I did not want to causes him anymore stress and I knew that he did not feel well so, I just left him alone. Even though he was here he was watching the game and I was on the computer. I did not feel the closeness that we usually share and It felt different. I use to want to hold him and cuddle and just be up under him but I did not want to do that this time. I know that this means my feelings are changing for him, this is not at all what I wanted to happen. He spent the night and he was in such pain we just talked about nothing the majority of the night. and we took turns holding each other. I still enjoyed his company. The next morning he drove me to the train and took our son to school. I know we have to have that talk it is like a burden that I just want to let go of.
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